Remember in Breakfast at Tiffanys when "Fred baby" is telling Holly how he loves her and she insists on running to Brazil and he finally decides to jump off that taxi but not without giving his two sense "Guess what baby you built that cage and your the only one in it..." he basically tell her the cage shes in she built and put herself in it. Ive come to the realization that i may have done the same thing in a rather bigger way i think.. who knows, you can be the judge of that.
In the process of trying to better understand myself and be ME, I cant but help to feel i have lost myself, allowing others to mold me the way they want me; by doing that I am not being ME now am I ?! Let me explain a little, you see i got out of a relationship, rather broke myself out of a relationship because i felt trapped and i thought i knew best of what i wanted. Only to get myself into a relationship where everything i say and do is even wronger then it was in the last one. Do you know how annoying and hard that is?! I am told how to feel and when to feel this way and when i dont get certain feelings during the times i am suppose to, i get in trouble for it.GEEZ AM I A CHILD.
This is me, Andrea Beth:
I love to be around friends (good/bad/medium/hot (jk)). I love to travel, especially going to a place i call home AUSTIN. I would love to move out of dirt valley and into a whole new place. I am a very caring, loving, giving person. I am understading, very active, outgoing, trustworthy, faithful and most of all your all american sweetheart. I am very motherly, i have been told by a handful of friends i would get there vote as the mother of the year. They're silly people. I am superwoman! okay im overdoing it. I love to do things for people, although im a big people pleaser this can be good and bad. Yet I can also be mean somewhat of a female dog, if you will. BUt this is only if someone has really pushed me over the edge. It happens very rarely i have noticed that i enjoy doing detective work, try to solve things. If someone says something about me i want to know what it is, if someone asks about me i want to know why? It gets the best of me but once i get the story together i am very pleased. Ive recently learned about different non profit organizations id lke to help out with, but will go into that later. I am a God Fearing Woman. I love GOD very much. His light may be somewhat dimmed at times in me but hes there and behind that little bitty shadow hes on fire and bursting through me. (hope that made sense) I can not way to see what God has in store for my future if anything I am praying each day that he hurry and open my eyes to what it is.
Most of all other then my love for God. I have this love that i cant wait to share with that special someone. My other half. The man of my dreams. THe man who no matter what loves me and will take care of me... I cant wait to meet him (if i havent already).
One more thing a big thing about me: I am very emotional. I CRY alot! I am a big crybaby. It can be both a good and bad thing.
To get back to that cage issue and losing myself to find myself. I found the door to that cage and flew out, my problem now is finding the way to the castle and along the way finding the prince who can make me the happiest princess i know i should be.
1 comment:
I know you don't want to hear from me, but I watched Breakfast at Tiffany's several weeks ago, and I've had these quotes sitting in my email always ready to be sent for some reason. I realized how much you resembled Holly Golightly, but I also know that you have the heart of Audrey inside of you. I won't delve into too much, now's not the time, but here it is anyway:
"Curiously enough, she's a girl who can't help anyone not even herself. Thing is, I can help her, and it's a nice feeling for a change."
"You know what's wrong with you miss...whoever you are...you're chicken. You've got no guts. You're afraid to stick out your chin and say, 'ok, lifes a fact. People do fall in love. People do belong to each other; because that's the only chance anybody's got for real happiness.' You call yourself a free spirit, a wild thing, and you're terrified someone's going to stick you in a cage. Well baby, you're already in that cage - you built it yourself - and it's not bounded in the West by Tulip Texas, or in the East by Somali-land, it's wherever you go; because no matter where you run you just end up running into yourself."
by the way, I know that besides my own non-profit organization, I want to somehow find a way to help those that confront Honor Killings and Slave and Human Trafficking. I don't know what you're thinking, but if you want to look those up and research you might find something there to support as well; especially the honor killings.
I should probably point out the irony in that my last blog is very similar to this one. Again, this isn't the right venue to be speaking, so I'll just leave it at that.
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